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Wide face? Play soccer

According to a new study, the title character from the ’90s cartoon Hey Arnold! (seen above) would’ve been a great World Cup soccer player. Scientists analyzed the ratio of facial width to height in a sample of about 1000 World Cup soccer players and compared their findings to how many goals, assists, and fouls the players tallied. According to the Boulder Daily Camera, they found that players with high width-to-height ratios scored higher in all these metrics, leading the researchers to believe that players with wider faces played more aggressively and at higher levels than their slender-faced counterparts. The team postulates that earlier exposure to testosterone in puberty could result in both wider faces and greater athletic prowess. Maybe Helga meant to say, “Move it, fútbol head!”

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